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Wednesday, August 27, 2014

"They Don't Know DickShit."





"I can't spend the rest of my life coming into this
 stinking apartment every ten minutes to pore over
 the excruciating minutia of every single daily event."
- Elaine, in "The Bizarro Jerry"


I love Elaine (and Julia Louis Dreyfus)
She is, by far, one of the funniest
best written
fucking hilarious
women on sitcom TV.
EVER.

So...
That quote right there?
That's kinda exactly how I feel right now.
Insert 'fandom' for 'apartment'
EXCRUCIATING MINUTIA.
Brilliant.

That's the kind of lame-ass bullshit
that has been going round and round
this fandom for months now.
Don't you find it all so very tedious?

I can't with the analyzing every fucking detail
of Rob and Kristen's lives.
I can't with people just making up 'salacious bullshit'
to further their agenda...
My God
Just LET THEM BE.
Get.Off.Their.Dicks.

Nothing you do or say
is going to change
What is.
No matter what you believe.


"But I don't want to add to this already pre-existing,
 enormous mound of salacious bullshit that isn't real. 
That's not me defending anything. That's true.
 Just being in the middle of it it's weird to comment on it.
 But I feel oddly capable of stepping outside and going,
 "Isn't it obvious to everyone?"


"I try not to let it mess with me, because my true personal life,
 as much as people think they know about it,
they don't know dick shit.
 Who could? By the way nobody knows.
Nobody knows what the fuck is going on."


See?
Nothing.
Nobody knows anything.
All the cousins
and all the experts
and all the insiders
don't know 'dick shit'.

I don't think she could be any fucking clearer.
I would think if you could believe ANYone...
It would be Kristen.



Kristen was on the cover of Vanity Fair France.
Breathtaking.
Stunning.
The above quotes and pictures were from the interview.
It was a good read
(once it was translated)

So what else is happening besides
the excruciating minutia of the fandom?

Well.
We.
Got.
 THIS!!!!



Shaggy and Scrappy are back!
I can't even put into words
the fucking FEELS (yeah, I said feels)
I get when I see these two
TOGETHER.
It's like...
overwhelming nostalgia
combined with
overt joy.

And come on...
Its not just Shaggy and Scrappy...
Its Scooby, too!


What in the world would you do...
IF
Fucking IF
You were walking down a street in NYC
and came across this trio?
Uh huh.
Think about it.
This is just about perfect...
You know?
(just about)
I mean...
Rob AND Tom
Walking.
And I don't mean to exclude dear Sam...
But
ROB AND TOM!
I can't tell you how happy this makes me.
Or did I already?
Because I really am not sure what I have just typed
and I could just be typing and typing all kinds
of random shit and making a horrific ass out of myself
which lets be honest happens all the time
but my sweet lord
seeing Rob and Tom casually walking down the street
all wrinkled and scruffy and strutting
and sunglasses and baseball hats!
!Whew!
That's exhausting!

And then today?


We get more.
More.
More I tell you... MORE.
One. Two. Three.
In a row.
And who knew that Tom and Sam
both had earrings?


And dear lord...
we get even MORE.
I kinda envision their hotel suite...
With a big pile of wrinkly slightly worn clothes
in the middle of the room
with another pile of hats on a table.
And hey...
you just grab whatever you want and
pull it on no matter what it looks like
and who cares if its hot as hell outside...
There is nothing wrong with a knit beanie!
I kinda picture a bunch of friends
talking and eating and drinking
and laughing...
oh lots of laughing.
Enjoying the company while they can
before they go back to their busy lives.
Old friends are the best friends.

Anything else?
Does anything else matter right now?
*cue maniacal laughter*


The Rover.
(OK, I typed The Rober. I need sleep)
It's available on iTunes right now.
I haven't seen it yet.
I really
REALLY
want to see it...
But I also kinda want to buy the DVD.
I have all of Rob's movies on DVD
(with the exception of the Neibelung one)
And I kinda wanna own the actual DVD
So...
It's only a couple of weeks more... Right?
Rock. Hard Place.
And there I be sitting between them.



I didn't get to really talk about
Rob and Kristen's ALS ice bucket challenges...
(wonderful charity btw)
But that's kinda old news now.
Just wanna say...
They are both fucking adorable and generous
and I love them.


This post is brought to you by the letter B

B for Bear and Bernie and Cole!
Oh how I love how those three simple names
made the lunatic fringe... cringe.

KS: Bear and Bernie and Cole.
 They're my real security team.

They wanted to believe SO HARD
that Kristen had given up Bear and Bernie to Rob
and gotten Cole to replace them.
Oops.
Guess not.
And honestly... Like Kristen or Rob
would EVER give up their beloved dogs.
Get fucking real.

B for Bullshit
No one wants or needs
bullshit 'experts' to analyze pictures
that are over 2 years old.
Enough already.
Those pictures... that whole shitty episode
belongs in the past.
This isn't really about Rob and Kristen
Not that it ever was.
This is about someone who supposedly wants people to
believe they have secret insider sources.
Who gives a fuck?
You know dick shit.

Kristen said so.


B is for Bumblebee
I know someone who named their
daughter... Bumblebee.
I'm not kidding.
Makes Apple look pretty good, huh?


And last but never least
B for BRILLIANT.


I will NEVER get tired of this.

I adore you Thomas Sturridge.


Until next time.

Bye for now

35 comments:

Marjorie1211 said...

It was so great seeing Rob and Tom together again. I hope all three have a wonderful visit in NY. Thanks for this fantastic post, Rose you never fail to bring a smile to my face.

Delle1 said...

I'm hysterically smiling to myself if thats even possible...Lolz!

Birdie said...

"Shaggy and Scrappy" are back. I remember the first time you printed that and still love it.
I would bet they are having a great time.
I am waiting for the DVD but sure wish there was a theater that showed more indie films.
The VF photoshoot is one of the best Kristen has done. The shorter hair is wonderful on her. And she says it again(as has Rob)nobody knows anything. I believe her.
Hope everyone had a wonderful summer!

Kay said...

Love it, Rose.

Take care, be safe and be happy Rose, Roseland, and quiet lurkers.

<3

katy said...

Excellent post, Rose!!

So fucking fed up of people getting all worked up over the stupidest things about Rob and/or Kristen. "Get.Off.Their.Dicks."

Love Kristen's Vanity Fair France interview, and she looks absolutely gorgeous in those pics.

It's a utter joy to see Rob and Tom hangging out...Sam too of course (And, where is Marcus?)...but got to say, Tom is my favourite Rob friend.

Since The Rover didn't came out here...waiting for DVD to add to my Rob movie collection. Really eager to see it!

Take care everyone

DreamerKind said...

A trio of merry men playing & walking

Down in front of Casey's
Old brown wooden stoop
On a summer's evening
We formed a merry group

Boys and girls together
We would sing and waltz
While Tony played the organ
On the sidewalks of New York

East Side, West Side
All around the town
The tots sang "ring-around-rosie,
"London Bridge is falling down"

Boys and girls together
Me and Mamie O'Rourke
Tripped the light fantastic
On the sidewalks of New York

That's where Johnny Casey
Little Jimmy Crowe
Jakey Krause, the baker
Who always had the dough

Pretty Nellie Shannon with a dude
As light as cork
She first picked up the waltz step
On the sidewalks of New York

Things have changed
Since those times
Some are up in "G"
Others they are wand'rers
But they all feel just like me

They'd part with all they've got
Could they once more walk
With their best girl
And have a twirl
On the sidewalks of New York

Lyrics/Sidewalks of New York (1894)

DreamerKind said...

Only so many minutes in my day, and so little time for fussing and fighting, my friends. Only time will tell. We can work it out.
****************************

Hit The Road To Dreamland

Dean Martin:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tf0jCEAdAcg

Bye bye baby
Time to hit the road to dreamland
You're my baby
Dig you in the land of nod

Hold tight baby
We'll be swinging up in dreamland
All night baby
Where the little cherubs trot

Well, look at that knocked out moon
He's been a-blowing his top in the blue
Never saw the likes of you

Bye bye baby
Time to hit the road to dreamland
Don't cry baby
It was divine but the rooster has finally crowed
Time to hit the road

Lyrics|MetroLyrics

DreamerKind said...

@Birdie
Bye!

@Rose
:)

@katy
Hi!

@Kay
Rockin'

@marjorie1211
Nice to see you!

((o))

Unknown said...

Rose,
You are absolutely THE BEST! I love, love, love it when your new blog comes out. I love you honesty, your sense of humour and your obvious respect and love for RP, KS & TS. Thank you so very much.

Unknown said...

Rose,
Oops! It should read 'your' honesty. Thank you.

Pisteuo said...

Hey Rose and Roseland!

Kristen was correct several years ago when she said..."it wouldn't matter what I said"....cause even when she tells everyone that "they don't know dickshit"....they still claim they do! It all comes right back to desparate obsessive people will believe what they want to believe....which is okay until they try to make other people believe it as a fact.
The question is...what do they have to gain by all this gossip they spread??
Tabloids do it for the money.....but, why would supposedly fans do this?? Why...especially when they are viewed as crazy old women. It really should be an embarrassment to them.

DreamerKind said...

Love at the core

A Rainy Day Refrain

The Andrews Sisters:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OX1AMNzIio

Thanks to/Michelle Marie

DreamerKind said...

@Pist
No one knows why.
**********************

I Know An Old Lady

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xa1j680x5Fk

I know an old lady who swallowed a fly
I don't know why she swallowed a fly (Oh me oh my)

I know an old lady who swallowed a spider that wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her.
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly.
I don't know why she swallowed a fly (Oh me oh my)

I know an old lady who swallowed a bird
How absurd to swallow a bird.
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider that wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her.

She swallowed the spider to catch the fly. I don't know why she swallowed a fly (Oh me oh my)

I know an old lady who swallowed a cat imagine that she swallowed a cat. She swallowed the cat to catch the bird.

I know an old lady who swallowed a dog.
She was a hog to swallow a dog.
She swallowed the dog to catch the cat.
She swallowed the cat to catch the bird.

I know an old lady who swallowed a goat.
Opened her throat and swallowed a goat.
She swallowed the goat to catch the dog.
She swallowed the dog to catch the cat.
She swallowed the cat to catch the bird.

I know an old lady who swallowed a cow. I don't know how she swallowed a cow.
She swallowed the cow to catch the goat.
She swallowed the goat to catch the dog
She swallowed the dog to catch the cat. She swallowed the cat to catch the bird.

I know an old lady who swallowed a horse, a horse?
Do you think it's really possible to swallow a horse?
No way

Thanks to/TheLearningStation

DreamerKind said...

Am too wined up to edit lyrics. Who cares? Not this old lady but I am not swallowing creatures, nevertheless!

DreamerKind said...

Life is one long jubilee

Who Cares?

Frank Luther/Arden & Ohman (1932):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WaqgRVJiqpg

Thanks to/MusicProf78

DreamerKind said...

Not that anyone asked but I highly recommend any red wine by Rodney Strong vineyard. Priced from $20 to $75. Will change your thinking and drinking.

DreamerKind said...

That's A Fact

Status Quo (1976):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kgmCLU5YPY

Sitting in a cornfield looking at a cob
Thinking of a long line waiting for a job
And I'm alone and that's a fact
I'm alone and that's a fact

Sitting in a full car someone at the wheel
Going to a new stop, I wonder if it's real
And I'm alone and that's a fact
And I'm alone and that's a fact

I need to maybe talk to you
Said I need to, and said I need you
I need to, I need to be with you
I said I need to, I gotta see you

Sitting at a new stop, didn't get the job
Couldn't find a long line, took another drop
And I'm alone and that's a fact
So I'm alone and that's a fact
And I'm alone, and I'm alone
That's a fact, that's a fact

Thanks to/Michalis Limassol
Lyrics/www.azlyrics.com/lyrics

DreamerKind said...

A wedding & love's still a thrill

In The Still Of The Night

Al Bowlly:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q3x6uFzOXps

In the still of the night
As I gaze from my window
At the moon in its flight
My thoughts all stray to you

In the still of the night
All the world is in slumber
All the times without number
Darling when I say to you

Do you love me
As I love you
Are you my life to be
My dream come true

Or will this dream of mine
Fade out of sight
Like the moon growing dim

On the rim of the hill
In the chill
Still, of the night

Thanks to/L. Heitmann
Lyrics/www.stlyrics.com

DreamerKind said...

Goodnight, little love doves!

marley said...

It's been awhile but what a great post Rose!!! I loved all the walking pics with Tom and Rob. and I really loved the pic of Kristen in the white dress with her short hair. I'm happy not knowing and anything about anything other than my own insanely crazy life.

I hope everyone is doing well and had a great summer!! I personally can't wait for FALL. :)

Barb said...

Look at the gun show!

Love you Rose! Glad to have you tell me (or others here) what is going on so I can then go an look it up. Glad I don't know dick shit! One thing I do know is they haven't moved on. :)

...a fan said...

Loved the VF pics and the last revision of the interview. Could not be prouder.

Enjoyed your words Rose, as always.

Unknown said...

Good night to all the Roselands! Sorry I took so long. With work and everything else with RL. But I am still here.
Love the post too.

DreamerKind said...

Happy Birthday to all who celebrate in September!

Unknown said...

Excuse me for a while,
While I’m wide eyed and I'm so down caught in the middle
I excused you for a while,
While I’m wide eyed and I'm so down caught in the middle
And a lion, a lion, roars would you not listen?
If a child, a child cries would you not forgive them

Chorus:
Yeah I might seem so strong
Yeah I might speak so long
I’ve never been so wrong
Yeah I might seem so strong
Yeah I might speak so long
I’ve never been so wrong

Excuse me for a while,
Turn a blind eye with a stare caught right in the middle
Have you wondered for a while
I have a feeling deep down you’re caught in the middle
If a lion, a lion, roars would you not listen?
If a child, a child cries would you not forgive them ?

Chorus:
Yeah I might seem so strong
Yeah I might speak so long
I’ve never been so wrong
Yeah I might seem so strong
Yeah I might speak so long
I’ve never been so wrong

Excuse me for a while,
While I’m wide eyed and I'm so down caught in the middle
Have you wondered for a while
I have a feeling deep down you’re caught in the middle

Chorus:
Yeah I might seem so strong
Yeah I might speak so long
I’ve never been so wrong
Yeah I might seem so strong
Yeah I might sṗeak so long
I’ve never been so wrong

Unknown said...

Salut. Je me demande si Rob va défendre Kristen à une dernière fois de cette femme évidemment malheureux et ennuyé, qui n'a pas mieux à faire que Kristen insulte! Que pensez-vous? Kristen n'a jamais dit un mauvais mot à propos de quelqu'un, elle est comme un bon cœur et intelligente jeune femme! Kristen est un philosophe, elle est intelligente, elle est au-dessus de ces choses, mais ça me fait mal pour elle parce qu'elle ne méritait pas un tel traitement de la femme d'un «ami» de Rob et je lui souhaite au moins une fois de se lever pour elle .

Anonymous said...

I don't get why some fans would rather believe in fairy tales than in K's words -> "Nobody knows what the fuck is going on."

@DK
Thank you for the birthday wish!

DreamerKind said...

In case you can't guess

Who

Brent Barrett & Rebecca Luker (song 1925):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bCx9LanDR0U

When a man's in love with someone,
He must be indeed a dumb one
If her secret he cannot unmask.

When if I am in love with someone,
I must wait until there'll comes one
Boy who knows the answer
When she asks-

Who - stole my heart away?
Who - makes me dream all day?
Dreams I know can never
Come true,
Seems as though I'll ever be blue.

Who - means my happiness?
Who - would I answer "yes" to?
Well you oughta guess who,
Who - no one but you

When a man's in love with someone,
He has got to overcome one
Obstacle that's always in the way.

Finding words to pop the question
Gives him mental indigestion.
Possibly, you'll get me when I say

Who - stole my heart away?
Who - makes me dream all day?
Dreams I know can never come true,
Seems as though I'll ever be blue.

Who - means my happiness?
Who - would I answer "yes" to?
Well you oughta guess who,
No one but you.

Thanks to/hoffemay
Lyrics/www.thepeaches.com

DreamerKind said...

@ADD
My pleasure!

DreamerKind said...

Sometimes that's the only way

I'm Funny That Way

Marion Harris (1930):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTEMUlNuL14

Thanks to/OldTunesAndMore

DreamerKind said...

Saying goodnight

In The Dim Dim Dawning

Irene Taylor/Paul Whiteman Orchestra (1932):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1bULP-pSnLQ&list=PLA2D96A570685010A

Thanks to/Prozoot

DreamerKind said...

Moving myself and the music to Rose's new post. See ya there!

DreamerKind said...

Each plays a part

Are You Lonesome Tonight

Elvis Presley:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cS5aCozhcA

Are you lonesome tonight,
Do you miss me tonight?
Are you sorry we drifted apart?

Does your memory stray
To a brighter sunny day
When I kissed you and called you
Sweetheart?

Do the chairs in your parlor
Seem empty and bare?
Do you gaze at your doorstep
And picture me there?

Is your heart filled with pain
Shall I come back again?
Tell me dear
Are you lonesome tonight?

I wonder if you're lonesome tonight
You know someone said
That the world's a stage
And each must play a part
.
Fate had me playing in love you
As my sweetheart
Act one was when we met
I loved you at first glance

You read your line so cleverly
And never missed a cue
Then came act two

You seemed to change
And you acted strange
And why Ill never know

Honey, you lied
When you said you loved me
And I had
No cause to doubt you

But I'd rather go on
Hearing your lies
Than go on living without you

Now the stage is bare
And I'm standing there
With emptiness all around

And if you wont come back to me
Then make them
Bring the curtain down

Is your heart filled with pain
Shall I come back again?
Tell me dear
Are you lonesome tonight?

Thanks to/musicislifee01

DreamerKind said...

NYC, Washington DC and 9-11

You Will Not Be Forgotten

Keaton Stromberg;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PMPxGsO0pOA

You will not be forgotten. the life, the presence you have given to me. whoa whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh . and uh,

Now you will remember the life, the presence, you are leaving us behind, leave the world behind, and try not to remember the trouble and the hardship that this life brings. whoa, whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh.

You will not be forgotten. You’re moving onto better things, pursuing your new life, finding what it brings, and you will not be forgotten. no whoa, whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Believe… believe in me.
Believe in what you’re seeing. Believe… believe in me.
Believe in what you’re seeing
Please don’t go.

I just wanted you to know
That I love you so
So much I can’t let go.

Thanks to/5SOS-is-my-everything
Lyrics/http://awesome-writers-r-us.tumblr.com/

DreamerKind said...

Ending my day with Chopin & Rubinstein

The Chopin Collection (157 clips)

Artur Rubinstein:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ed2ZtwCDvvw&list=PL050B847FDA1CA642

Thanks to/ArRubMusic